Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Separation Anxiety

I love and adore dogs. Cute, soft, cuddly, playful, happy. Dogs are ready for action at any moment. Is there anything sweeter than a dog curled up and relaxed taking a nap? They love with such uncondition and loyalty that it puts people to shame by comparison.

I have been blessed to have been owned by several amazing dogs during the course of my life. And I say owned by them because, well its true. They – Rusty, Princess, Taska, Roughie, Poochie, Fawn, Patches, Lucy, and currently Gracie – have ruled the house, and my heart.

They each shaped and trained me, and really my heart, into the person I am today. And for all their unique virtues and strengths there has been one common characteristic in these dogs that surprises me. They don’t like being left alone.

Take Gracie for example. She is a border-collie mix of some sort. I rescued her from the pound, or rather we rescued each other. She is much smarter than I ever will be and can out run just about anything. She stares at me constantly, as if studying me for any sudden moves. She is protective and loyal. And she pouts when I leave.

If I am nearby, she feels safe and secure, confident and bold. But when I am far away and out of sight she gets anxious, agitated and loses her peace. She will pace, stare out the window searching for me. Eventually, she will tire and nap, but she is most content when she is right next to me.

I found this to be true of many of the dogs I have lived with through my life. Most of the dogs, but not all, were rescues. Perhaps separation anxiety is a common trait among rescuees. Having been lost and orphaned and then being rescued and loved, there is a bit of fear they may once more find themselves lost and alone.

I know how they feel. It’s a scary world out there and I get agitated and lose my peace too. Some days I feel so confident and secure; I feel like I could conquer the world. But some days I feel the exact opposite; I feel weak and puny, I am full of anxiety and fear. Most days I have a combination – some moments I’m confident and the next I’m not. There are days when the last thing I possess is peace. What I don’t understand is why?

Like many of my furry companions, we too have been rescued. Scripture tells us that Jesus came to rescue us. (Luke 1:74) He rescues us and protects us from our enemies. And I believe that when I am feeling close to God, bathing in His nurturing light and love, I have all the confidence I need. But when I am far from Him, when I don’t feel His close presence that’s when I begin to unravel and feel like an orphan, lost and alone.

Feelings are funny and fickle things. And they lie to us alot. Gracie feels like I may never come back because she can’t see me. But her feeling is wrong. There is no need for her to worry. She can trust me; she can trust that I will return and take care of her.

During the four years I have had Gracie, our relationship is stronger, and the trust bond is too. She understands, to a greater degree, that she can trust what she cannot see, and her peace does not leave her when I do. That I am here to love and take care of her.

Like Gracie, my feelings of weakness and lack of confidence because I cannot sense God, is a lie. It is a lie told to me by my enemy to get me out of peace and off my game. God is never far from me. As my bond with God strengthens, the more I understand this. I can trust what I cannot see and I don’t have to lose my peace just because God is out of sight. He is here with me always loving and taking care of me.

Perhaps you can’t teach an old dog new tricks, but thankfully a new dog can teach an old gal a little something.
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